insert and remove rapidly
I was sitting at the bar in myPub™ recently when I felt the distinct brush of a hand against my derriere. Spinning my head around in a near-Exorcist fashion and preparing to execute a death-by-white-hot-glare, I discovered a very red-faced man behind me as he retrieved his Visa from the floor by my feet. Apparently, his knuckle-grope had occurred due to his attempt to catch the errant plastic goblin in mid-air. I would imagine the mere sight of the back of my head had sent him into a paroxysm of desire and consequent fumbling.
Not being one to pass on a perfect opportunity to provide further embarrassment to a dashing stranger . . . “Dahling,” I instantly quipped, “regardless of what your friends have told you, swiping your credit card in the crack of a girl’s arse only works with strippers!”
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June 25th, 2007 at 8:55 am
I can’t believe you fell for the old “sorry, i dropped my credit card” act!
June 25th, 2007 at 8:56 am
HAHAHA!!! Good save, DK.
June 25th, 2007 at 8:56 am
Drive by hand jobs? now that is new…
June 25th, 2007 at 9:31 am
John: I can’t believe *he* fell for the old “Now you have to pay for my drinks all night” act!
June 25th, 2007 at 9:55 am
Visa. It’s everywhere you want to be.
June 25th, 2007 at 11:14 am
At least he didn’t quail and ask if you took Discover.
Beautiful response, DK.
June 25th, 2007 at 12:13 pm
Nice one DK……
June 25th, 2007 at 1:36 pm
Myra: Clever!!!! *claps hands in delight*
June 25th, 2007 at 2:58 pm
Hey, you got to admit that I played that pretty smoothly considering I was completly drunk and that it was truly an accident.
JMS
June 25th, 2007 at 3:14 pm
John Spuhler: I can admit to that! You were a good sport about me picking on you!! Especially after all those BullBlasters that you went on to inhale.
June 25th, 2007 at 3:16 pm
Hey Julia, I’m so glad that I gave you some inspiration to write your creative masterpiece of “insert and remove. I was the you met that night with Brad at the pub on saturday night. If you like call me at [number removed by the incredibly gracious DanjerusKurves] or E-mail me back.
John S.
June 25th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
OH BOY ……………….LET’S ALL CALL JOHN !! SOMEONE PLEASE LET JOHN KNOW THIS IS GOING OUT INTO CYBERSPACE…………………..OH, NEVERMIND, I JUST DID ……….GIGGLE
June 25th, 2007 at 4:00 pm
John S.: You really should thank your lucky stars that underneath my razor-like wit there is a genuinely nice person. I removed your number from public view so you won’t get 500 calls from spammers and/or telemarkers. Oh, but don’t blame me if CAT calls you.
June 25th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Who in the hell is CAT
June 25th, 2007 at 4:26 pm
John S.: CAT is Cathie. She left the comment before yours up above. She’s a good friend of mine. She’s beautiful, single, but lives far away. She also has occasional issues with remembering to turn off her CAPSLOCK.
I’ve now deleted both your phone number AND your email address. Heads-up: it is NOT a good idea to publish personal info. on an unsecured website. Did you notice the counter down below? That’s how many internet visitors/spambots that this site has had thus far … I tried to email you back at your “corrected” email address but I am not a paid subscriber to that website. If you have something personal to say to me, you might want to put it in an email and not here … click the Home link in the top-right corner of this screen and it will take you to the Home Page; there is a link on the right-hand side (by the photo galleries) that says “Email Me”. Click that link and magic happens.
June 26th, 2007 at 10:25 am
………………and Magic it certainly is !!!!! pffffffffffffttttttttttt to ‘who in the hell is Cat” yes , sometimes I have problems remembering to turn off caps lock…..I always use caps to unput data into MLS.
June 26th, 2007 at 10:26 am
and you made me all misty eyed saying I am beautiful !!
June 27th, 2007 at 7:12 am
he he he! You funny DK…and you are such a tease with the titles of your posts! ;O)
June 28th, 2007 at 3:13 pm
He tried that with a Visa?
Tell him to get an American Express.
June 29th, 2007 at 7:49 am
Mist: “American Express” was my nickname for my last boyfriend. It had nothing to do with credit cards though.