Dear Judi,

You are an amazing and brave woman. Talking to you and seeing the way in which you so elegantly held yourself together at the visitation last evening truly humbled me. As you requested, I did, indeed, jot a note on the memorial card on my way out regarding C__’s adorable habit of hurrying from work to meet you for dinner. When I reached home, however, I felt moved to share more of my thoughts.

I was so used to seeing C__ at the office — busy-busy-busy, business-like, but always friendly. It was a pleasant change to see him at the firm’s 2007 Holiday Party. I remember sitting across the table from C__ and Judi and smiling broadly at the way C__’s face simply lit up when he gazed into the eyes of his bride. There was almost an air of stunned disbelief about him, as though he still couldn’t really believe that this lovely woman was actually, truthfully, honestly his wife. That she had unquestionably married him. That she loved him! It was as though he had one foot firmly on the ground . . . but the other foot was drifting skywards as he floated on Cloud Nine and held tightly onto her hand to act as his anchor to the Earth and the reality that he belonged, heart and soul, to this lady. I recall turning to my friend and hearing a whispered “What a pair of lovebirds!”

In the few short months that I worked with C__ we walked to the parking garage on several occasions. I was the only woman, I think, who could walk fast enough to keep up with him. Although, I suspect that even then he was discretely slowing his pace. Most of the time, C__ would walk a step or three with the security officer and me and then declare “I’m sorry, excuse me, but I have to meet my WIFE!” Always with that ring of joy and pride when he said “my WIFE!” Always. He was fond of sharing the tidbit that their favourite restaurant was the Amazon Grill. I do not think I have ever seen anybody walk that fast while keeping their feet on the ground! But then, he was surely driven by the thought that the faster he walked, the sooner he would be with her.

C__ got a mild kick out of my English accent so when he recently had a question with regard to the school system in England, I called an English friend and enquired for more specifics. When she left me a return voicemail, rather than giving C__ a quick answer, I simply forwarded her message to him so that he could listen to her accent also. Judging by his return message, he was quite amused.

A couple of days before C__ passed away, he and I walked to the garage together and he chatted buoyantly about his love of running. He mentioned that he had run track while in college (I am sure there is a more accurate American description than my British brain recorded). He spoke of his days in the Army Rangers. He chuckled as he jokingly talked about how he could run so much faster than his WIFE! that he would have to run for a while alone and then practically slow to a walk while his WIFE! jogged. I told him he had best not make that joke in front of her or he would be doing some unplanned running!

As devastating as it is to lose a loved one, personally, I believe that it is better to leave behind a happy life and a happy love. To pass on while in love and doing something you love may seem cruel to those left behind, but to the person departing it is a huge kindness.

I believe there were only two things that made C__’s heart pound and his blood rush and his passion soar . . . running . . . and running to meet his beloved lady.