I like to buy gallon jugs of olive oil from Sam’s Club, add herbs and spices, allow the jug to steep for a period, and then dispense some of the oil into a small bottle for ease of use. Dispensing requires the use of a plastic funnel placed into the neck of the small bottle. It’s really quite easy … usually. Today while pouring the last remaining fluid ounces of oil from the jug into the bottle, the funnel decided to defect, causing about half a cup of oil to splatter all over the kitchen counter. I instantly grabbed the paper towels. The paper towel roll came off its holder, knocking over the jug. I reached for the dish liquid which, covered in oil, promptly slipped out of my hand, squirted across the other (clean) counter, and landed in the spilled oil. Meantime, the small bottle overflowed all over itself (from excitement, apparently). Much Windex and paper towels later, my kitchen returned to normality. “Hey”, I thought to myself, “that would make a funny entry in my blog.” So I slung the salmon filet into the broiler, the potato wedges and onions into the oven, and zipped upstairs to rapid-type the foregoing events. I returned to the kitchen to find the timer screaming frantically for attention, some unidentifiable charred lumps that would challenge a forensic pathologist, and a bit of smoke billowing out of the kitchen. I’m now on first name terms with the local firemen. In fact, they’ve invited me to their next BBQ, but they insist they will do the cooking.

And you ask why I don’t like to cook?

This entry was posted on Sunday, April 25th, 2004 at 3:41 am and is filed under Humour. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.