Testing . . . Testing
I have been doing a bit of job-hunting of late. Unfortunately, the Houston job market is still miserably sluggish due to the involuntary influx of hurricane evacuees bringing in a flood of cheap labour. I still feel really bad for these people, but they are buggering-up the job market for those of us who have put in our dues here already. I’ve been thinking, do you think maybe we could ship say 40,000 of you off to say . . . Alaska? Just an idea. I’m all about being helpful and charitable and all that jazz.
One downtown law firm asked that I take a “judgment test”. Apparently, being a grown-up with a long and healthy career, excellent references, and no criminal record do not guarantee that I have any common sense whatsoever. One of the many borderline-insulting questions on the “test” was this:
Q: What would you do if a client walked in and said he had “fired” the attorney and wanted his file?
a. give the client his file
b. tell the client that you were not authorised to give out files
c. ask your attorney for permission to release the file
Being me, and not being particularly interested in the firm, I decided to have a little fun.
My answer:
Well, the first problem I see here is that much like cops, attorneys are never around when you need them. However, since we all know that attorneys are second-only to doctors in terms of semi-deity, despite needing the constant protection and hand-holding of their beleaguered assistants, I’d have to say that I would:
(a) Give the client the file along with the highly confidential files of several other clients;
(b) Offer to shoot the office manager and burn down the building;
(c) Threaten the former client with a billable blowjob; and
(d) Hand over the name/number of the next firm where I would be working.
Amazingly, they still wanted me to return for an interview . . . I declined.
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February 26th, 2007 at 12:34 pm
Too freakin funny………………………awwww c’mon …. go back for the 2nd interview………humor them, and give us more to smile about !! be a sport !!!
February 26th, 2007 at 12:35 pm
Happy hunting!!!
February 26th, 2007 at 1:39 pm
Clearly your skills lie in the field of writing…you need to become a (paid) digital diva.
February 26th, 2007 at 2:55 pm
Was the person grading it a guy? You DID use the word blowjob…
Not saying guys are deep, but we do like what we like. For instance it still would have been funny without the bj line, but it wouldn’t have made me snort loudly enough for the new person in the next cubby to ask if I was OK.
N
February 26th, 2007 at 7:38 pm
“Apparently, being a grown-up with a long and healthy career, excellent references, and no criminal record do not guarantee that I have any common sense whatsoever.” Have you ever worked customer service? Common sense is the BIGGEST oxymoron ever. No one seems to have it anymore. Remember: 50% of people are dumber than the other half.
February 27th, 2007 at 8:53 am
HAHAHAHA!!! I’d have gone back for the 2nd interview. Who knows? Maybe they’re in need of a good looking, intelligent smart ass.